There is Power in Smiling
When I wrote my last post my father commented on it… he suggested writing a post about smiling.
I have been told that I smile a lot. And yes, I think I do. Even when going through hard times, I find some amusement in little things that bring me back to smiling. Or at least I try to.
It’s one of those things… I don’t even know how it happened or why it comes out. I seem to have a couple of threads pulling my lips up. I guess I am lucky. At least I feel blessed.
Perhaps that is why when I cry my beloved ones become startled. Why are the corners of my mouth pointing downwards? What the heck is going on? That’s not you! And within my beloved ones I count myself.
When I don’t smile I don’t feel like myself.
Yes, as strange as it sounds… but when I don’t smile, I don’t feel like myself.
Let’s back up a little bit and let’s talk about why we smile.
I remember around 15 years ago I was lining up to buy something at the university cafeteria. A girl that was in my class approached and as I saw her, I said hi and smiled. She said: “Why are you always smiling?”. She didn’t say hello, she kept walking to the end of the line (I could have helped buying something for her as I was at the front). I was totally shocked and startled. I stopped smiling, of course. She was a friend of someone that later on became my boyfriend. He used to call me “smile with legs”. That is an anecdote.
That day I understood that there was something in that smile that characterized me, but could be shocking for some. Was it authenticity? Was it something else? Why was she so annoyed? She is not the ‘smiley” type of person, of course, and rather serious, even rude? Why did she feel threatened? Did she? Why did her comment erase my smile?
Anyhow, this little story illustrates just how a natural ‘giving’ situation, can bring up so many emotions.
So, why do we smile?
In my humble opinion, we smile because we want to share something. We want to acknowledge that the person in front of us deserves a nice gesture, deserves to receive a little love from us. This is not a rational process, or even a conscious one. It’s a very deep ingrained mechanism for interaction.
You know what, let’s ask Wikipedia, and see what it has to offer:
A smile is a facial expression formed primarily by flexing the muscles at the sides of the mouth. Some smiles include a contraction of the muscles at the corner of the eyes, an action known as a “Duchenne smile”. Smiles performed without the eye contraction can be perceived as “fake”.
Among humans, smiling is an expression denoting pleasure, sociability, happiness, or amusement. It is distinct from a similar but usually involuntary expression of anxiety known as a grimace. Although cross-cultural studies have shown that smiling is a means of communication throughout the world, there are large differences between different cultures, with some using smiles to convey confusion or embarrassment.
Interesting. So there are definitely different types of smiles… Being the genuine one, and the natural version, not the only one. Maybe she reacted because she thought it was the second type? Or she could not genuinely return the “favour”?
Why do we smile? I am going to divert from biology and psychology here, as this is not want I want to deepen into. I think we smile because we are projecting joy from our soul to our surroundings. Joy, that state of bliss that sparkles within us, that brings happiness into our lives.
Joy is the ultimate emotion
Joy is the ultimate emotion, as it is love bursting through our pores and out through our face.
They say that no manifestation can occur without joy. It has been stated that enjoying life is the antidote for all problems. Joy is the ultimate YAY! about a situation. It automatically makes you smile. Smile IS a consequence of joy.
Can we smile then at a teller of a bank while we are withdrawing our last cents after bankruptcy? That is definitely not a joyful situation… but the answer is a deep and emphatic YES. Why? Well, the teller is our fellow human. That is a plain and the simplest answer I can find.
Yes, we all deserve some love and attention, even if we are having a bad day. Why not? The poor teller has nothing to do with our lack of financial abundance. Yet, joy CAN bring us abundance. In many ways, and this is not only the dollar signs you are thinking about.
A smile is a powerful tool. A smile is a good weapon and here I will aim to highlight some very practical uses of it:
Spread Love As A Virus
As we smile, they smile. And this is psychology. Most people (not my beloved classmate) will respond with another smile. This is more contagious than yawning. It will improve communication and relationships. Beware of fake smiles… that definitely doesn’t work! You want to empower others, not take that power from them.
Smiley Soothing Cure
Smiling eases tension and helps in difficult situations. Yes, life is hard… so why don’t we try to smile more often? Even laughing at ourselves is an antidote for hard times. And it can help healing physical illnesses too.
You Will Live A Longer And Healthier Life
And this is backed up with studies (I don’t know which ones or which peer reviews, sorry about the lack of references here), but it has been said that people that laugh live longer. Might not be true, but you will make the same 85 years you are hoping to get so much better, they will feel like 150! It affects your hormonal system and that is for sure. Who doesn’t feel better when smiling or laughing? Good chemicals rush down your bloodstream, making you… smile even more.
Connect To Your Inner Joyful Self
The key to manifesting the life you want is within you. Without joy we swirl in patterns, we are prey of fear and limiting beliefs. Connecting to your smile is tapping into that inner wisdom. A genuine smile is being you… completely you.
“Wear a smile like an elegant gala dress.” ~ Unknown
Yes, people will notice your face first (even if men will look at your ass too ladies). If you walk into the room with the corners of your mouth pointing downwards, I assure you, the deal will not close as easily with your client! You won’t get a second date with that handsome guy!
Play Being A Dork
As I said before, life is hard. Why don’t we play a little? Be a cartoon of yourself sometimes. Smile often, and life will be less hard, easier to navigate.
Face Faith
“I knew a man once who said, Death smiles at us all.” ~ Roman Emperor Maximus.
If you can do something about the situation, smile and do it. Don’t worry. If you cannot do anything, smile and relax. Why worry? It will make you frown.
Give A Gift
So you don’t have money to buy gifts for everyone? Give a smile. You don’t know him or her? Who cares? A smile IS a gift. A truly precious one. So start giving!
Exercise
What we don’t use, we loose. Did you know that the face has more muscles than we can imagine? Well, same as abs… if you don’t use them, you loose the six-pack. Thumbs up for decreasing wrinkles (or increasing them around the eyes, but who cares? I don’t. lol!)
You Will Learn A New Language
The body speaks. As we smile, we communicate to people from all around the world. You don’t need to know mandarin or thai. Just smile… you’ll most likely get more out of any language-barrier situation.
Flexibility
Our minds are made of play-doh. Yes, we can shape our reality the way we like. We can use a smile to turn a situation toward our advantage. Be careful… fake smiles should be used with caution, but can help in some cases. Get used to genuine smiles, and then give it a try with the fake ones and see what happens (tip: rehearsing in front of a mirror for fake ones can be a good idea).
Flirt
What can be better to flirt than smiling? Melt a man or woman with a nice smile… success guaranteed. Make sure you allow your eyes to get involved in the smile, though.
Be Happy
All human beings are after happiness. If smiling is a sign of joy, then smiling can bring happiness closer to you. Reach it!
Be Human
In the animal kingdom, who else smiles? We are homo-smiliens.
So, in short, that and much more is the power of smile.
So, today, I would answer back at my beloved classmate: “I smile because I like sharing my soul”.
I personally smile because I want to exercise the power of giving a gift and spreading some love. I choose that instead of frowning… just because life is about choices, and some are better for humankind than others.
Have you smiled today?